Sunday, June 29, 2008

I Made $45,342.53 in ONE DAY on MySpace!!!

Ninety percent of making money online is attitude; the other half is skill. Some would like to believe that luck is involved in making tons of money online, but I greatly disagree. I even have the online income to prove it. Luck is a fantasy word. The true internet marketer or online entrepreneur doesn't depend on luck; they depend on a random chance occurrence that arbitrarily brings them into good fortune. There's a big difference.

Having become a master of online revenue generation myself, I can now share with you how "the rich get richer, and the poor get poorer". I have learned so many different money making secrets on how to generate online income, that now I am a multi-millionaire with multiple revenue streams to my credit. One of these streams was created just yesterday while I was on MySpace, blogging about how horrible Ashlee Simpson's outfit in People magazine was.

Yep, I made $45,342.53 yesterday, within a 1-hour period, while I was on MySpace!!! How did I do it, you ask? The process was very simple, and completely repeatable. Here's the basic overview of how it was done:

1. As I said earlier, I simply logged on to MySpace as usual and started blogging about celebrity drama like many MySpacers do.

2. While I was logged on, I left the computer for a few minutes and walked down the street to a local convenience store.

3. I bought 3 lottery tickets, the kind with the cool scratch-off games.

4. I scratched off a winning combination and WON $45,342.33 just like that!!!

5. I cashed in my winnings, returned home, and continued blogging on MySpace, fully aware of my extraordinary capability to attract money and success no matter what I do.

Now as you can tell, this is a very repeatable system for anyone else looking to create online income with a minimal amount of real work. All it takes is a little elbow grease, some determination, and the directions to the nearest convenience store. Now go and get 'em, and make cash with the rest of them!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Make So Much Money Online That You Vomit $100 Bills!!!

Tired of just making money online with no frills, thrills, or chills? Do you want to know what it's like to have a blog moneymaking extravaganza of monsoonish cash rolling in to your life and literally knocking you flat on your back with a thunderous crash of eardrum-shattering profit-pulling multimillionaire-making typhoonish tsunamish abundance??? Then get in on my plethora of money making secrets. One only has to peruse my blog archives to realize the ridiculous amount of cash manufacturing secrets that are stored in this treasure trove of online revenue generation. Is this blatant self-promotion? Heck yeah. That's how we internet marketers make things happen.

So whether it's making money with AdWords, or using StumbleUpon to make money, or even tweeting yourself to near-insanity while making money with Twitter, you have found the one-stop shop for all of your online education on how to be an internet marketing wondermoneymaker. You wanna know how to keyword stuff? You wanna understand the difference between black hat and white hat techniques? What about top hat techniques? See, you don't even know about that one, do you? That's because the top hat set of SEO strategies is only reserved for the most elite of SEOers. That's a whole other post, for another time. In fact, I may only release those techniques to my current list of 4,563,423,677.33333 RSS subscribers. Who else do you know would anchor the term 4,563,423,677.33333?

So at the end of the day, the only reason why I'm going through this whole promotion is to prove to you that if you stick with the money making techniques I teach, you will eventually make so much money that you will literally vomit $100 bills. Where else can you learn cash-generating techniques that make even your puke worth money? Nuff said.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

I Stumbled Upon Making Tons of Money Online with Stumble Upon!

To the person with frequent motor skill failure, you can make big money online using StumbleUpon. For those who may not know, StumbleUpon is a social networking site primarily geared towards people with low levels of physical coordination (hence the name). People stumble in & out of various web portals, bookmarking and sharing sites of interest along the way. It's a wonder that they're able to even accomplish this much, given the lack of motor skills that they're dealing with.

For the savvy internet marketer such as myself, you can easily see a world of money making opportunity just beckoning you to plunder its bottomless wealth by taking advantage of all these stumbling, tripping, and falling people. Being a person of superior physical prowess, I am not able to relate to all these people that stumble for a living, but I can sure market to them! Although it's not the norm for any internet marketer to divulge their money making secrets, I have so many different ones in my arsenal, it won't hurt me one bit to let one "leak" out to my faithful readership--all 4,563,423,677.3333 of them.

The first step to making online income from Stumblers is to identify the core problem that they all share in common, and find a good affiliate product or Google Adsense niche to meet that problem. Since their problem is obviously lack of physical coordination, I would focus on any type of medical treatments that could greatly improve hand-eye coordination, or anything that would help restore a person's correct equilibrium. This is an Adsense money maker going somewhere to happen.

Once you have identified the problem, and then matched the appropriate money making product to that problem, sign up on StumbleUpon and promote the CRAP out of that product to all of your fellow Stumblers. If you thought their coordination was poor to begin with, wait until you see how they trip, back-pedal, and lose all sense of good balance clamoring to buy your product or click your ads! You have a veritable universe of people just chomping at the bit to fork over money to you, to the point that your Paypal account is deluged with astronomical amounts of orders that literally break ALL of Paypal's servers and shut the entire system down, causing them to cut paper checks to everyone, including yourself!!! The only difference is, YOUR check will be for millions, while everyone else will just sit & watch, fuming with envy.

I hope this post has opened your eyes to the potential that StumbleUpon has when you match it with a make money online blog. Don't be an idiot...stumble into your multi-millionaire online business today!!!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

I Made $35,673.9777 in One Day While Tweeting on Twitter!!!

Folks, there are a ton of ways to make money online, and if you're clueless as to even one, it's best that you just close up shop and get out of the business entirely. In this post, I'm going to dive into only ONE of the many money making secrets that I have accumulated over the past few years that has enabled me to bring in an appendix-rupturing amount of money, creating yet one more stream of income to add to my multiple revenue streams that keep my money coming in for periods of time that are longer than this run-on sentence I'm writing right now.

Just to give you a little incentive to read further, I'll go ahead and put this out there: I made $35,673.9777 on Twitter.

Yep, on Twitter.

How did I do it?

Tweeting, my friend. Just tweeting.

For those who may not know, Twitter is a social networking website that enables people to perform bird-like functions. Random, miscellaneous and obscure communications fly back and forth on Twitter at the speed of light. These communications are known as "tweets". Among these tweets you will see such things as what people are eating for dinner at a given moment, how much their shirt from K-Mart costs, and random "atta boys" and "talk to you soon's" aimed "@ John", "@ Red Dog", or "@ Happy723". Those who are addicted to tweeting will swear that they cannot live without these "tweets", and hang on the edge of their seat to see whether or not "Jim555" woke up at 9:30 a.m. or 10:00 a.m. this morning. Most Twitter addicts consider all of this tweeting activity to be a wise investment of time. I, however, consider it to be a wide open, gaping field of money making opportunity beckoning me to partake of its tweeting bounties.

The way that I earn cash online with Twitter is by tweeting about how much money I make online doing other online business ventures. Other Twitter addicts see these tweets, and are forced to check out my website, which usually sends me a plethora of traffic just ripe for blog monetization. Once the traffic arrives, I usually monetize my blog with some sort of pay-per-click ads a la Adsense or Yahoo Publisher ads, and these tweeters begin a torrential clicking frenzy which rivals the speed of a school of piranhas skeletonizing a whole cow.

So there it is in a nutshell--my money making system known as "Tweet-Mining". A simple, and yet powerful money making method that works every time, because tweeters can often be suckers. If you doubt whether this method can make your blog make money, I feel sorry for'll be the one sitting on your couch without $35,673.9777 of extra pocket change to carry around.